Day 13 – Poet’s Billow Challenge: Recipe for a good marriage

Today’s challenge asks to write on a poem in the form of a recipe. This poem doesn’t have to be about food but an abstraction like love, wealth,pride. I’ve chosen marriage. 

This recipe has been crafted from a combination of my own experiences and lessons learnt and observations from friends, family and colleagues and not to be read as an expert’s advice but a creative piece for reflection – your comments are very welcome.

Recipe for a good marriage

Ingredients

This recipe will require 4 key ingredients which are further broken down into other individual ingredients. Some proportions will vary according to personal taste and dietary requirements

(1) ¼ portion of mutual attraction

  • Physical – shop around a bit to determine suitable quantities you require in relation to beauty, physique versus sex appeal. Note that the sex appeal which exudes from your potential partner is not always to do with physical features (Note also that physical features do change with age so choose with this in mind)
  • Things in common – Buy enough common interest to enjoy together but get a sufficient bunch of individual and diverse pursuits to stay interesting and not be overly dependent on each other
  • Chemistry – feel the attraction through that magical click of mind, body and soul. This is often not a tangible ingredient. You’ll just know when you enter the store
  • Communication – buy a bunch of verbal and body language skills and a bottle of intuition
  • Intelligence – Try to find equally matched quantities of intelligence
  • Passion/romance – You might need to shop around for this special ingredient in the spice shop. A packet of mixed spice is recommended including mild, medium and hot
  • Companionship – If all else fails, this can be your saving ingredient, therefore it should be high on your shopping list

    (2)    ¼ portion of compatibility

Suggest you buy all these in bulk, you won’t always know when you may need it.

Try  to get a complete pack that includes all of these ingredients

  • trust
  • humour
  • space/freedom
  • respect
  • tolerance
  • patience
  • forgiveness
  • finance
  • values and beliefs

(3)   ¼ of satisfying sex

  • mind – A Bouquet garni of mind over matter is vital, and is good to include in a marinade before putting your dish in the oven
  • mood – A box of dinner treats, chocolates, wine, fireplace, music, dance, and thoughtfulness must be acquired according to taste and be added to the marinade
  • moves – Ensure that you buy a packet of liquorice all sorts here since you’ll need to vary your flavor as and when you choose and buy a box of headache tablets in case you need them

(4)  ¼ of family

  • children – This might be optional but if you consider it a crucial ingredient, decide on quantity and how you want to prepare it ahead of time since your meal will need to include it everyday like salt
  • extended family – Be sure to look beyond seeing this ingredient as a trimming since it can make your meal wholesome or spoil the taste completely
  • time – Buy plenty of time to make allowance for preparation, flavoring and shelf life of your meal. It is also important that there is enough time for everyone’s plate including your own

Method

Sift through portions 1 and 2 and mix and stir until all ingredients are smooth and creamy. Preheat the oven. Heat portion 3 separately until it has reached the right temperature and mix well with portions 1 and 2. Place in a large casserole dish and bake for as long as you can. You will need to keep basting your dish with portion 4. While portion 4 is very important, you may have to alter according to taste.

This serves a maximum of two as a main course. Dessert is optional and dependant on whether you have a sweet tooth. Note that dessert if not considered carefully, can ruin your meal.

When love chills

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Out for a late lunch and so were they,

a perfect family in a corner, facing the bay.

But the imperfections showed in their eyes.

Hers had long lost their sparkle; living lies.

 

It’s not the first time that I’ve perceived

that faraway look. Can it be retrieved,

the love that surely resided in their hearts

before vows crumbled into isolated parts?

 

Her eyes held weariness and sorrow captive

in an aging face that was once very attractive.

He nursed his beer, doubtless about its taste,

a scowl crossed his face, somberness-laced.

 

Had they quarreled or was this just a sign

of a love that had long lost its gleaming shine?

It’s not the first time I’ve seen such desolation

dining out together with very little conversation.

 

I wonder what happens to marriages like this

when couples feel empty, forgotten their first kiss.

Going through the routines like a clock in machine

even with the blessing of children in between.

 

As they stand up to leave and pay their bill

I toast to us and take another Sangria refill.

An unsettling sandstorm rolls across the shore

as I join in the laughter behind that closed door.